"But Kevin, bro... it's the 4th quart-"

Shut up, bro. Sit down. We need to talk.

I'm not going to give you my usual thoughts after each game. Even though I know Heffy loves those. He sends me a text every Sunday like "bro I read it again, 8th time. you are truly a great football mind" and I'm like bro, I know.

Instead we're going to talk about the underlying current in NDSU football in the Matthew "Marlboro Karen" Entz era: we have become everything we hate.

Do you remember in the glory years watching college football and seeing dumb shit shit like looking to the sideline for a play call and thinking to yourself oh man I'm so glad I'm a fan of a man's school like NDSU where we don't do that gimmicky shit?

Do you remember in the glory years watching us line up in I-Formation when everyone else was 6 yards back in a shotgun and thinking to yourself oh man I'm so glad we understand that football is won in the trenches and we run a pro-style offense here?

Do you remember in the glory years watching the first guy usually make the fucking tackle while everyone else was playing bumper cars and thinking to yourself oh man I'm so glad we AREN'T FUCKING PUSSIES who can't tackle? That must be really frustrating how does UND do it?

Do you remember in the glory years watching mostly mistake free football and thinking to yourself oh man I'm so glad the only thing I have to complain about is a vanilla offense? Do you remember mocking teams who lacked discipline and committed penalties and did dumb shit shit like taunting?

Do you remember in the glory days beating shit teams like UND and thinking to yourself oh man I'm so glad that we don't suck? It must be really hard how does UNI do it?

Well, we're worse than UND now bro's. We're worse than UNI.

We've become something unrecognizable.

And the only you change that is to take Entz out to pasture. Lakes can raise the funds for the buyout I'm sure of it.

Return to tradition.