Originally Posted by
Bison Loaf
Damn! 2020 has been a long, tough year. But that doesn't mean we can't hike up our skirts, put on our big boy pants, and dream about all the great things to come!
Merry Christmas, Thunderstruckers!
'Twas The Hour Before Meet 'n Greet
'Twas the hour before Meet 'n Greet, when all through the Lot,
Not a person was sober, and I kid you not;
Our flags were all flying, our grills were not bare,
In hopes that AC/DC would FINALLY be there!
The guests had broad smiles and were having a great time;
Even the small bladder schmucks in the long potty line;
Hot mommas in their skinny jeans, and I, school-boy shorts,
Had just settled on a time to get acquainted, of sorts ;),
When out in the Lot there arose such a clatter,
I spilled some of my drink (dammit!) to see what the hell was going on out there! (Who can rhyme at a time like that?!)
So away from those ladies I flew for a look,
Anticipation was rising with each step I took.
But I fell on my ass from the new-fallen snow,
Spewing words so obscene - a new personal low,
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But Five Righteous Rockers sippin' Australian beer!
With a little lead guitarist so lively and cool,
I knew it was THEM, so I started to drool.
So much larger than life did they seem when they came,
That I giggled like a schoolgirl when I called them by name:
"Oye Angus! Aye Brian! Hey Cliff and Phil too!,
Feared you guys weren't coming, make me look like a fool!
And Stevie, come here, let me pat that fine back
Of the man who's the "glue" now on each rockin' track."
The formalities finished and my praises well sung,
Time to do what they came for, while the tailgate was still young!
So up to the big stage their old knees did creek,
While the crowd full of doubters seemed to suddenly freak!
"Holy crap! Dumbass Loaf really DID it, I guess!
"Yeah, but don't be so sure he won't screw it up YET!"
As I was jotting those names who would feel my wrath later,
Came the first power chords through the amp regulator.
The sound was GINORMOUS, butts puckered a little
I myself passed out cold, numb lips oozing out spittle.
When they finally revived me, what I heard and I saw,
Was pure Rock incarnate, and it filled me with awe!
One was dressed as a schoolboy from his head to his toe
Though he walked like a duck, he could put on a show!
And the singer, that voice, as it growled and it whined
Sounded like Thunder, chills crawled up my spine!
I was basking in my glory, realizing my life's vision
When I spotted some bastard from General Admission! (Son..of..a......BITCH, how did he get in here!!!!)
He was icky and scary, sporting a mullet top shelf,
And I barfed when I saw him, in spite of myself;
So with a wink and a whistle I summoned the law
And they beat the dude senseless, what little I saw.
My good work complete now, our world back in balance,
I filled up my drink and enjoyed all this talent,
The show was so bitchin, it ran overtime
So we missed the Game Intro, for the LIVE ONE outside! (Is that cool, or WHAT!)
Then withdrawing a finger from inside my nose,
I nodded my approval for the event to now close.
Our boys didn't wave, didn't bow, didn't smile,
They just walked off badass, more befitting their style
But I heard them exclaim, as they left out the rear —
“Happy Tailgate to all, and we'll see you next year!”